The Return Chapter 4: I love my son

It was 18th Jan 1997. Savitri passed away after a year long struggle with cancer. I had taken voluntary retirement from the army. Ironically those were probably my best moments with Savitri. It was as if I caught up with all the things I had missed out in twenty years of marriage. Twenty years and I had never before had the opportunity to fall in love with my wife. All my life I had traveled from army post to army post. She had been the pillar supporting all that I had. And all I had left by the end of it were her and Sandeep.

We did not inform Sandeep until she had gone away. In hindsight that was probably my biggest mistake. We did not want his engineering studies to get affected. That day he came back home to see his Aai in a white sheet. He just hugged her and sat there for hours. We never looked into each other's eyes. Did I not have the courage to do that? All my life I had only heard stories of my Sandeep. I was not part of any of them. I did not know his language. For days we sat at the same table. He never talked to me unless I asked him anything. Every time I tried, he shut himself away from me. Every night after he went to bed I would go to his room and have silent conversations. That was his last year in college. I eagerly waited for him to come back in the next vacation.

"Nana I am leaving for Chicago next month. I got into University of Chicago.", he said as soon as he came back from college one day.

I did not know what to say. So I said the next thing that came to my mind.
"Sandeep how can you do that? How can you betray your country like this? You can't leave India"

He left on 10th August 1999. Ten years had passed like ten million. I incarcerated my life in the memories of Savitri and Sandeep. The old boxes still had his old clothes and toys. I redecorated his room like I would have if I was around when he was a toddler or when he went to school. I had come to terms with my life. I just would not have Sandeep sitting next to me or sharing a drink with me or take me to a movie ever. The best I could do was recreate his existence when I did have a chance and not take it.

That day was different though. It was Savitri's birthday. I kept staring at the phone all day. Picked it up a hundred times to see if it was working. I canceled all my usual day chores. But it did not ring. It did not ring.

After a sleepless night, I convinced myself that everything was just the way it should be. I should be happy for him. For what tremendous success he had achieved in a foreign land. Something his father could never achieve. Seven gongs on the old wall clock. Time for my morning walk.

"Namaskar Malvankar Kaka", I heard Shalini's voice.

"Arey Shalini Beta. How are you?"

"I am doing good Kaka. We just got MRI machines for the clinic."

"I am so proud of you beta. You are working in your own country and helping us build our nation. Nahitar Aamcha Sandeep (Not like my son Sandeep)"

"Kaka! Thanks for the support. But whats wrong with what Sandeep is doing? I mean you should be proud. He is doing so great for himself in Chicago!"

"Whats wrong? He is doing good for a different country! The govt. spent so much money on his education in IIT and he abandoned our country like a traitor. How could he leave his country, his Nana...", I had not let myself talk about him with anyone since then. I could not talk to her after that. I just could not let myself open up the feelings that I had put away long time ago. I felt this sudden urge to talk to him. I had never asked for his number even when he wanted me to take it. I thought I could punish him by keeping distant. But who was I punishing?

The Return - Chapter 3: The Phone Call

It had been three long years since I started the Gajanan Medical Clinic. And it still felt like yesterday when I ventured into this godforsaken village. Serendipity works in mysterious ways. Not a day goes by without the thought of how different and futile my life may have been, had my US visa gotten accepted. In the pits of depression, I was saved by a community much less fortunate than my royal household.

The day started like any other. I reached the health center greeted by a scores of people on my 10 minute walk.
"Dr. Shalini Ruparel MBBS MD", said the plate outside my office. But I was more than just the doctor treating them. Over time, I came to know each and everyone from the slums as I would know someone from my family. Within a year, I lost all misgivings about having a nuclear family with no relatives and siblings.

I spotted Malvankar Kaka on his brisk morning walk. Even at 60, he maintained his crisp dressing. His shorts and t-shirt seemed right out off the ironing board.
"Namaskar Malvankar Kaka"

"Arey Shalini Beta. How are you?"

I knew Malvankar uncle as a friend of Dad. He was never close to me when I grew up. But he had supported me when my family opposed my plans for the Medical Clinic. He had since always been the voice of reason whenever I had a problem.

"I am doing good Kaka. We just got MRI machines for the clinic."

"I am so proud of you beta. You are working in your own country and helping us build our nation. Nahitar Aamcha Sandeep (Not like my son Sandeep)"

"Kaka! Thanks for the support. But whats wrong with what Sandeep is doing? I mean you should be proud. He is doing so great for himself in Chicago!"

"Whats wrong? He is doing good for a different country! The govt. spent so much money on his education in IIT and he abandoned our country like a traitor. How could he leave his country, his Nana...", Malvankar Kaka suddenly stopped. He raised himself on his toes as if stopping himself at the edge of a cliff and taking a back step. I had unknowingly ventured into a forbidden territory. He just gazed down not knowing how to respond to his own thoughts.

After a moments pause, I put my arm on his shoulder.
"Kaka are you ok? Why don't you say something to Sandeep? When did you last talk to him? Kaka?"

"Leave that aside. I almost forgot. I am getting late for my morning walk. I must get going. I must get going.", It only took him a moment to brush aside the emotions as he walked away without letting me respond.

I got through the day. But all the while I could not get Malvankar Kaka's hapless expression off my mind. He was so supportive of someone like Hari, who had left his home in Bihar to make a living in Pune. Was it the same for Sandeep? Well maybe. Maybe not. But even if it wasn't, I had to find a way for him to express his feelings to Sandeep.

As I was gearing up to leave for home, I remembered that I had Sandeep's mobile number on Kaka's medical file. Would it be weird if I called him? I did not even know him. Maybe I can say I am Malvankar Kaka's doctor.

"Hello this is Sandeep Maalvahnkar. I can't take your call right now. Please leave me your name, number and a brief message and I will get back to you as soon as possible", said a heavily accented voice. Boy people change when they go to the US. God who knows maybe I would have too if I had gotten my visa. What would they do with my surname? The beep on the voicemail snapped me out of my trance.

"Hi this is Dr. Shalini Ruparel from Pune. Malvankar Kaka is my patient. I wanted to talk to you about him. He is seriously missing you. But I guess he doesn't know how to say it. Hopefully you understand his situation. I think he is feeling lonely and it would be great if you call him. Hello Hello!", damn I lost signal again. Perks of living in a village I guess. Hope that message went through.

A couple of days later, I logged on to orkut. I had a friend request from Sandy Malvankar.
"How is Nana? I am leaving for India. I will be there on DL-114 on Sat. morning 9:15 pm"

The message felt abrupt. I was unsure why he had let me know about his flight details. Maybe he wanted to surprise Malvankar Kaka. That would make him so happy.
I did not know what to do next. It was too late for me to arrange for any taxis from Mumbai airport. Maybe I could get someone to drive my car to Mumbai. Last month Hari had driven my car to the Nashik health camp. Maybe he could pick Sandeep.

"Kajra Re Kajra Re Tere Kaare Kaare Naina, Kajra Re Kajra Re Tere Kaare Kaare Naina", gosh I hated songs on ringtones. Specially when you set it for the caller.

The Return - Chapter 2: Airport Pickup

"Kajra Re Kajra Re Tere Kaare Kaare Naina, Kajra Re Kajra Re Tere Kaare Kaare Naina"

No matter how many times I heard the ringtone, it still brought a smile on my face.

"Hello"
"Hello Hari? This is Dr. Ruparel"
I was always scared of doctors since the injection Dr. Yadav gave me as a seven year old. But Shalini Madam was different from others. She had a clinic in our colony and provided free checkups to paupers like me.

I was on my feet in a moments notice and said, "Haan Shalini Madam. Boliye"

"You need to go to Mumbai."

"Mumbai?", a sweat broke on my brow. I listened to the rest of instructions nodding my head all along.

"Hello? Hari? Are you listening? So you need to leave for Mumbai tomorrow afternoon. You can pick up the car from my clinic in the morning. I will let you know the rest of the details tomorrow."

"Jee Shalini Madam. Don't worry. I will do it"

A year ago, I was one of thousands who boarded the train to Mumbai. I had made a promise to Maa that Hari Prasad Shukla will one day clear all of Baba's debts and plow his own fields. Two days in Mumbai and I was beaten up by a mob. I don't know what I did to provoke them. They asked me my name and where I was from. Then they just threw everything I owned on the ground and beat me up.

"Muluk Waapis jaaneka? Samjha? Yeh Maharashtra hai. Tum Apne pradesh mein kam karneka. Idhar dikha to fir yaad rakhna!" (Leave right now. This ia Maharashtra. Go work in your own State. If you ever come back, you will face dire consequences)

I was running away from them when I bumped into Malvankar Sahiib. The vegetables in his hand dropped on the road.
"Sorry saab. I didn't mean to do that", I started picking the tomatoes from the road. Half of them had rolled into the gutter. I couldn't look him in the eye and tears rolled down my cheek.
"Arey arey. Don't worry. What happened? Are you okay?", he said with a smile as he brushed the dirt from his pajama. He was wearing a white kurta and pajama. His eyes were hid behind thick glasses but his calm gaze soothed the turbulence of the last week.
"Saab my name is Hari Prasad Shukla. Those MNS goondas beat me up for no reason. I don't know what to do. Where to go. I have no one in Mumbai Saab. I haven't even sent any money to Maa since I came here"
"Come with me. Don't worry."

I don't know what I would have done if I had not met Malvankar Saahib. He took me with him to Pune and got me a job at Narayan Seth's chai stall. A year later, I could talk to Maa every weekend on my mobile.

I was a little concerned about going to Mumbai. But Malvankar Saahib's son was returning from America. I stood outside the terminal with the placard Shalini Madam gave me.

"That is me", a man in black suit said.

I saw a younger Malvankar saahib. I picked up his bags and led him to the car. I had never met anyone who had gone to America. Once I had seen the movie with the ship sinking. Wonder what America was like. I did not know how to talk to him. He was such a big man.

He said something in English in a low tone. I mustered up the courage to say something. I practiced it in my head a thousand times.

"Saab my name is Hari. Malvankar saahib's house is next to my tea stall."